This Floating Excrement Was Far Too Meaningful! These Are the Television Disappointments of the Year.

As we consider the television landscape of the recent year, a handful of series stand out not for their excellence, but for their spectacular failures. From cringe-inducing spin-offs to bafflingly bad docuseries, here are the programmes that had us scratching our heads or simply reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this love/hate follow-up? Plagued with dreadful scripts, painful character development (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the show struggled to justify its existence. Briefly, as the final series began, it seemed as if it had finally found its groove. Then arrived an installment all about Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the showrunner declared this would be the last season. It ended on a bum note; the lingering shot of Miranda’s toilet full of poo was just way too symbolic. Still, viewers certainly found joy picking apart every single “wtf?” episode. And as Carrie – once again single – twirled around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t release a small sob?

The Kim Kardashian Drama

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? The answer is a resounding no.’

But that was almost the least of this show's issues. The subject of a very rare zero star review, it was difficult to know where to begin listing the problems. The hilariously leaden writing? The mind-numbing glorification of wealth and materialism? The seemingly wilful parade of tropes? Performances so bad they felt borderline malicious? Suffice it to say “all of the above” and never speak of this series again. Except, a new season has been ordered, so we’re probably going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Given the legal troubles, domestic violence claims and fatherly shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d truly have gleaned it from this multi-part docuseries which smirked its way at Sheen’s various bouts of reckless excess while failing to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any sympathy this series might evoke should be saved for the people who have had to suffer close contact with this charismatic but dismissive egotist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we understood it was preposterous from the get-go: a thriller about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We persevered out of pure admiration for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately hacking Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. Talk about giving up the ghost.

The Gangster Drama

Dodgy characters meeting in deserted boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.

In truth, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many seem a little dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the ignominy of having to accommodate unconvincing dialects. But there were plenty of other issues. Mainly that it was just really dull; a conflict over drug-selling territory between various cockney picaresques which seemed a bit basic.

With Love, Meghan

Given the extent to which she provokes the ire of certain ostentatiously angry commentators, it’s almost tempting to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s televised forays into quaint homemaking as intentional statements. But then you view them and are compelled to admit that in this case, they may have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle catalogue animated; a meme for evening drinks with ideas of grandeur; a procession of sleeping dogs, humming beehives, sentimental sayings and forgettable crafting “tips” you’ll forget instantly. All underpinned by vast, largely unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously interesting things to be discussed about regarding Victoria Beckham and her struggles with career, identity, self-worth. But for some reason, this three-part series chose not to say them. Rather, the viewing was like reading a sales brochure. She obviously has every right to resent what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But sadly, she didn’t do herself any helps with this cagey non-event of a series.

The Inheritance

It had the potential to be the next cultural phenomenon – except even camper, with a glamorous star playing dead and a sharp-tongued personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you want? As players competed, there was plenty of betrayal and squabbling. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s still too confusing to detail what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via prerecorded videos. The show ended up reeking of a programme that was straining desperately to live up to something way beyond it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How do you succeed a show that defined a generation? The expectation was enormous for this glitzy romantic comedy about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who lands in London with a shattered romance. The lead actress took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, embodying Jane Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was not enough. Plus, the abundance of famous friends involved felt icky.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not even good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the smart inclusion of gifted younger comics, hopes were high. But unhappily, most of it fell flat. A particular sketch was a one-note joke stretched to a dry pulp but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply provoked the idea that they should probably have stayed in there a bit longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively showcased the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an compelling drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The subject matter needed to be handled with care. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lurching from oddly breezy, somewhat mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Twisted? Arguably. A complete mess? Absolutely.

The Maths Genius Thriller

We love the star … but did we buy him playing the greatest maths genius in history, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a discovery that could ruin society? No! This international thriller about secret services spying on – and killing off – intellectuals frankly got more farcical by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This uncritical portrait followed the online personality renowned for sexual escapades as she prepared for her most extreme challenge yet. What on earth would possess her? What we craved was far greater examination of her true psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have spoken to the now-famous mum who appeared to drag her son out of the queue. What we got was horrific shots and zero critical analysis of her infamy whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.